Journal Entry: "Battle Buddies"
Sunday ended on a high note. I had a great talk with my battle-buddy, Nick while we rolled and folded clothes for our wall-locker display. He’s a cool kid and despite the 14-year age difference, we get along well and find many things to talk about.
DS Allen gave us another “pep-talk” and mentioned that she was disappointed in those she knew had leadership skills but are holding back. I’m pretty sure she was directing this at me she turned and looked straight at me and screamed it for added emphasis. She’s right —I am holding back for a number of reasons. One is that nobody liked the kiss-up that tries too hard. Another is that I feel like I just need to stay out of the way and let the kids play leader as, frankly, it would be way too easy for me to take over and get things on the right track fast. But honestly, I think some of them need to learn through hard knocks for a while longer. Another problem is that there are already too many trying to control everything, and as you might expect, it’s breeding resentment in the ranks. I’d prefer to remain the quiet positive influence and lead by example. I’m patient and really don’t mind the extra PT —at least most of the time. My body isn’t exactly used to the constant physical activity and 17 hour days that start at 5:00 AM, so part of the time I am suffering from fatigue. Again, it’s amazing how your perspective gets warped by your physiological circumstances. Today around lunch I would have sold my soul for a nap, but now I’m feeling strong again only two hours later. It’s a valuable asset to have presence of mind enough to understand the temporary and illusory nature of human perspective. So many kids here make some pretty stupid decisions in the wrong frame of mind. They make the mistake of thinking that their minds are interpreting their circumstances accurately and haven’t yet learned to recognize the fleeting nature of emotion. Apparently, there are a fair number of suicides in Army BCT. I certainly hope there is no one in my company that is feeling that lost and alone. I can only really keep an eye out for my platoon and so far, everyone seems in good spirits, despite the requisite bitching.
The DS’s have a sixth sense for identifying troublemakers and attitude problems. I made a list in my head of those I knew were going to be obstinate and the DS’s are now pretty much consistently on these guys and consistently not on everyone else near as much. It seems pretty clear that from here on out, I’ll be given a great deal more latitude when it come to my mistakes as I’ve gained the respect of several of the DS’s already. They have observed my willingness to do the job right and give it my best, and in this case, having them know you name is a good thing.
DS Allen gave us another “pep-talk” and mentioned that she was disappointed in those she knew had leadership skills but are holding back. I’m pretty sure she was directing this at me she turned and looked straight at me and screamed it for added emphasis. She’s right —I am holding back for a number of reasons. One is that nobody liked the kiss-up that tries too hard. Another is that I feel like I just need to stay out of the way and let the kids play leader as, frankly, it would be way too easy for me to take over and get things on the right track fast. But honestly, I think some of them need to learn through hard knocks for a while longer. Another problem is that there are already too many trying to control everything, and as you might expect, it’s breeding resentment in the ranks. I’d prefer to remain the quiet positive influence and lead by example. I’m patient and really don’t mind the extra PT —at least most of the time. My body isn’t exactly used to the constant physical activity and 17 hour days that start at 5:00 AM, so part of the time I am suffering from fatigue. Again, it’s amazing how your perspective gets warped by your physiological circumstances. Today around lunch I would have sold my soul for a nap, but now I’m feeling strong again only two hours later. It’s a valuable asset to have presence of mind enough to understand the temporary and illusory nature of human perspective. So many kids here make some pretty stupid decisions in the wrong frame of mind. They make the mistake of thinking that their minds are interpreting their circumstances accurately and haven’t yet learned to recognize the fleeting nature of emotion. Apparently, there are a fair number of suicides in Army BCT. I certainly hope there is no one in my company that is feeling that lost and alone. I can only really keep an eye out for my platoon and so far, everyone seems in good spirits, despite the requisite bitching.
The DS’s have a sixth sense for identifying troublemakers and attitude problems. I made a list in my head of those I knew were going to be obstinate and the DS’s are now pretty much consistently on these guys and consistently not on everyone else near as much. It seems pretty clear that from here on out, I’ll be given a great deal more latitude when it come to my mistakes as I’ve gained the respect of several of the DS’s already. They have observed my willingness to do the job right and give it my best, and in this case, having them know you name is a good thing.
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